Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Escada - Rockin' Rio

Experience the sensual rhythm of the samba and the sultry warmth of the... yeah, shut up. Don't go to Escada's website because it's one of those obnoxious websites that's all, "I'm best viewed with XX resolution. Here, let me maximize the screen for you! No, trust me, you want the screen maximized. I'll just disable the resize button for you."

Escada just might be up for a Diversey Hates Your Web Design nomination, and maybe even win a golden statuette in the shape of Jay Manuel.

(Please tell me you didn't click the Jay Manuel link.)

Anyway, it just isn't summer without Escada whapping you across the nose with some limited-edition tropical scent. Rockin' Rio, despite the lame name and lamer box, is really pretty good. Like mango or peach, or something similarly orange and fuzzy.

A far sight better than Ibiza Hippie, which is nice, seriously, but it smells like a Strawberry Shortcake doll and is not worth the $50 or whatever they charged.

If you must have a limited-edition fruity fragrance, get something from the Victoria's Secret Garden collection. They cycle through fragrances faster than members of Menudo, and they all have names only slightly more cheesier than Escada's. And they all smell, as a Vicky's Secret sales associate charmingly put it, "like sweaty kids and Kool-Aid."

But everyone who wants Rockin' Rio probably won't be dissuaded by me. And they've probably already bought theirs, leaving you lucky fellows to buy it for cheap. Try Froogling it.

Ugh. I feel dirty in an especially fruity way. I wouldn't have reviewed this one if I hadn't received a free sample at Ulta.

1 comment:

Girl said...

Girl, you can Rock my Rio any day of the week. Also, I've never liked any Victoria's Secret scent since my fave of all time, which I think was called "First Kiss" or "Blushing Kiss" or something similarly silly. It smelled so fucking amazing, and of course it is gone, gone, gone. That--and a knockoff cologne I bought in Spain--is the smell of high school. Sigh.